Funny Angry Bits

Road Rage

Temper Tantrums

Tiger Moms

What do all these have in common?

They all fucking see red and becoming fire breathing assholes that completely go off on anyone who is within a 500 ft radius.

As I am fighting to survive my body’s self defense mechanisms against me ingesting a smoothie with regular cows milk in it rather then almond milk. Yeah it’s not fun. Damn you lazy smoothie guy and your apathetic attitude towards actually having a job! I’m guilty of getting frustrated and sometimes forgetting that the world is filled with anything but red.

I guilty of letting my irritation show when I lose my sanity and throw out calm Buddhist monk persona. I’ve succeeded keeping my inner Buddha many times and people would ask why the fuck am I so calm.

I’ve had the pleasure to deal with children screech as if they were from some horror movie and probably scaring the neighbors two blocks down. Nowadays, children that scream like that are just learning that this terrible act isn’t going to get them anywhere, they’re spoiled and know that screaming will make their caretakers do whatever it takes to get them to shut up, or they are actually about to be killed. Then you have to deal with them not wanting to listen to you or behave because they believe that they are entitled to anything and everything. I still partially help raise my teenage little sister and damnit, I don’t need to even think about birthing one until I’m 30 or something. The idea of having another being grow within my body for about 9 months and wrecking a hormonal war zone doesn’t sound very fun to me. It means I have to be even more anal about the what I stuff my mouth with or what I do in my life.

Road ragers are pretty funny individuals. It’s amazing that the fact someone can become so enraged from being stuck in THEIR car because they didn’t have the sense to leave earlier/later or at least remember when the general rush hour windows are. I’ve seen some people go absolutely bonkers with their temple veins slightly bulging out because they were so angry. Some begin to uncontrollably beat their horns as if the annoying noise is going to make the cars boxing the individual move any faster. There are the individuals that actually get out of their box on wheels and walk a couple of feet just see what the hold up is, and there are those that just sit on top of their car. Yes, we have people that like sitting on top of their cars in the middle of the 2pm rush hour here in Los Angeles, California. It’s quite a sight to see. It’s especially hilarious when the people frustrated or confused contort thier faces and think no one is laughing their asses off looking at the weird faces they are making. I advise non road ragers against telling these angry, impatient, immature adult children to “calm down”. It’s almost as telling a woman to calm down. Why? Because we females will tell you that we are completely fine and the act of telling us to calm down as if we look like we have are going to bite your head off is no bueno. I don’t think some people would enjoy it if someone came up to you and asking, “You mad? Why you so mad?” to you when you’re not even the slightest bid annoyed. Yes, people just know how to piss people off.

“Tiger Moms” are women on a whole level of their own. And no, the title does not only pertain to tiny, angry Asian ladies that have it out for their children because they don’t want their children to be failures in society and don’t want to look like they couldn’t reach a half decent child.  I’ve seen some scary white mothers. Except, their definition of punishment is putting their children in a corner and telling them to think about what they’ve done wrong and not to do it again. I guess they emphasize being a part of some group and strive to be connected to others rather then focus on bettering themselves. I know I grew up getting the belt, whip, had to hold up a heavy ass chair over my tiny 8 year old head in the bathroom, runaway from bathrooms and closets, and fear the “1-2-3” countdown. There was no “time out” time of any sort. But I wouldn’t call my mother a “Tiger Mom” for the fact that she initially didn’t think I was going to go to a good university. I mean, I slept through my advanced classes all of elementary and middle school when I was in Georgia. BUT, I’ve seen some scary mothers in Georgia and especially in California. I never knew an A- was actually grounds to disconnect your child from all human contact after school. A outfit or makeup look warranted a girl to go “fix herself” before she could leave. It’s like, look here angry lady, your daughter is going to go off the wall if you keep her restrained like some sort of animal. Once she gets to college or have to survive in the real world by herself, she’s going to take full advantage of being “independent” unless you threaten her with her college tuition that you spent a quarter of your life saving up.

 

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